Jeff, here is the answer to yours or Jason's question "Does anyone have the recipe for Phony Baloney Soup?"
Jane did: "Phony Baloney soup: Mom used crushed Ramen noodles instead of making rivvels."
Now, you do remember how to make rivvels, right? 1 cup flour plus 1 egg cut together until there are little bitty noodley things. Mom usually used two knifes, criss-cross cutting them through the mixture to make the little pea sized noodles. Actually I think she used self-rising flour, I use regular, but Mom wins, hands down, as the best cook in our family.
Thanks Jane, it's nice for every family to have a hero.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Friday, May 21, 2010
Feelings
Feeling good?
Feeling grumpy?
Feeling sad?
Feeling curious?
Feeling antsy?
Feeling lucky?
Talking about bathrooms...
Onlineshoes.com's customer service bathroom is in a warehouse and so it is a warehouse type bathroom, yes the toilets flush and there is the appropriate paper, but it is huge, cavernous, cold, with two tablespoons of hot water and no amenities. Did I mention it was cold? Visitors from corporate hold their urine as long as they can so they don't have to trek to the dreaded warehouse bathroom and risk freezing a very important part of themselves. Warehouse workers wear long johns just to keep warm after going to the bathroom. On Seattle's hottest days this place is cold, cold, cold. I've even known a few employees to make a MacDonald's run to stay away from the chillish place.
Anyway...
I once visited corporate Onlineshoes with it's plush carpet, it's full kitchen, it's spectacular view of Lake Union, it's curved hallways, it's expansive layout, it's artwork. It is beautiful beyond compare, it has an on site Starbucks for frickens sake, but the only thing I lusted after, and I do mean the only thing I lusted after, was their corporate bathrooms. It was the middle of December and their bathrooms were heated, warmly, gently, pleasantly, they had hot and cold running water, automatic flush toilet, toilets warm to the derriere, automatic water faucets that turned on and off by themselves, think of the germs you won't pick up, scented hand soap, lotions, Kleenex, everything you would want in a first class corporate bathroom except a tip bowl. Did I mention it was heated. I visited the corporate bathroom in December and couldn't see my breath when I went into the water closet to relieve myself.
I learned what envy is...
It seemed like every time I went to our warehouse lavatory, which at my age and condition is more than once a shift, I'm pretty much an every two hour person, anyway, every time I went to our bathroom I felt that pang that harsh sting of corporate envy.
Feeling envy?
Do you believe envy prayers can be answered?
Well it looks like our new customer service call center will move to the downtown corporate offices. I wanted a bathroom like corporate and I'm getting a bathroom JUST LIKE CORPORATE. I will also get the warmth, view, artwork, security card, elevator, soap, lotions, Kleenex, scented air, Starbucks and the fortish mile commute.
At least it isn't that 2,500 mile commute to the east. It is a spits distance from the downtown REI, I can go there on my lunch hour and look at the exercise equipment. No, I can't, my lunch hour is before REI even opens. Oh where are those carpool lanes? When do the express lanes open up for South bound traffic? How do you get a bus/Sounder pass? Look out Seattle here I come.
Who said be careful of what you wish for? Of all the possible places our owner could have decided to move the call center this was the only one that I think could have surprised me. I had mentally prepared myself for anywhere, anywhere, but this caught me su-r-pri-s-ed! Well, obviously I didn't prepare myself THAT good, so now I'm feeling slightly abashed, a little goofish/foolish, but looking forward to getting yanked out of my rut. Oh wait a minute, Ian said I will just have a new rut.
Life isn't always a four mile commute.
Feeling grumpy?
Feeling sad?
Feeling curious?
Feeling antsy?
Feeling lucky?
Talking about bathrooms...
Onlineshoes.com's customer service bathroom is in a warehouse and so it is a warehouse type bathroom, yes the toilets flush and there is the appropriate paper, but it is huge, cavernous, cold, with two tablespoons of hot water and no amenities. Did I mention it was cold? Visitors from corporate hold their urine as long as they can so they don't have to trek to the dreaded warehouse bathroom and risk freezing a very important part of themselves. Warehouse workers wear long johns just to keep warm after going to the bathroom. On Seattle's hottest days this place is cold, cold, cold. I've even known a few employees to make a MacDonald's run to stay away from the chillish place.
Anyway...
I once visited corporate Onlineshoes with it's plush carpet, it's full kitchen, it's spectacular view of Lake Union, it's curved hallways, it's expansive layout, it's artwork. It is beautiful beyond compare, it has an on site Starbucks for frickens sake, but the only thing I lusted after, and I do mean the only thing I lusted after, was their corporate bathrooms. It was the middle of December and their bathrooms were heated, warmly, gently, pleasantly, they had hot and cold running water, automatic flush toilet, toilets warm to the derriere, automatic water faucets that turned on and off by themselves, think of the germs you won't pick up, scented hand soap, lotions, Kleenex, everything you would want in a first class corporate bathroom except a tip bowl. Did I mention it was heated. I visited the corporate bathroom in December and couldn't see my breath when I went into the water closet to relieve myself.
I learned what envy is...
It seemed like every time I went to our warehouse lavatory, which at my age and condition is more than once a shift, I'm pretty much an every two hour person, anyway, every time I went to our bathroom I felt that pang that harsh sting of corporate envy.
Feeling envy?
Do you believe envy prayers can be answered?
Well it looks like our new customer service call center will move to the downtown corporate offices. I wanted a bathroom like corporate and I'm getting a bathroom JUST LIKE CORPORATE. I will also get the warmth, view, artwork, security card, elevator, soap, lotions, Kleenex, scented air, Starbucks and the fortish mile commute.
At least it isn't that 2,500 mile commute to the east. It is a spits distance from the downtown REI, I can go there on my lunch hour and look at the exercise equipment. No, I can't, my lunch hour is before REI even opens. Oh where are those carpool lanes? When do the express lanes open up for South bound traffic? How do you get a bus/Sounder pass? Look out Seattle here I come.
Who said be careful of what you wish for? Of all the possible places our owner could have decided to move the call center this was the only one that I think could have surprised me. I had mentally prepared myself for anywhere, anywhere, but this caught me su-r-pri-s-ed! Well, obviously I didn't prepare myself THAT good, so now I'm feeling slightly abashed, a little goofish/foolish, but looking forward to getting yanked out of my rut. Oh wait a minute, Ian said I will just have a new rut.
Life isn't always a four mile commute.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Go Home
It was time to go home from work and I was reflecting on some older customers I had had during the day.
A Mr Sherwood from NE 50 th Street OKC OK. How is that for a bit of home pegging from the Universe? Mr Sherwood told me he was 86 years old and his horse had thrown him off, but here he was blithely shopping for some casual shoes for when he wasn't wearing his horse riding boots. He told me he didn't mind getting old that it was a privilege.
That was right after a customer from Indiana, I think, told me she was 85 years old and needed some good all purpose athletic shoes, for her aerobics, her yoga, her walking, her bike riding, heck she might have said her marathons but by then I was kind of in mind melt.
I remember Dad telling me when I was grown up lass that I wouldn't miss NE 50 th street that what I would miss would be him and mother. That home wasn't a place it was people. How true was that! I remember when Goleta CA was my home.
Home.
How delicious to go home when you are tired, scared, sleepy, worried, troubled. Home is where your people are, where your love is, where you feel safe. Jean and I talked about that, how sometimes you just want to go home and get out of the world for a bit. Away from tornadoes, bombs, accidents, disasters. Cliche that it is, home is where you hang your hat, whether it be for one year or eighty-six. Home is where Judy learned to walk. Marc built a deck. Janice feeds the birds. Or Ms 85 year old Indiana does her yoga.
Yeah, I think I will go home.
Life isn't always a pickle and cheese sandwich.
A Mr Sherwood from NE 50 th Street OKC OK. How is that for a bit of home pegging from the Universe? Mr Sherwood told me he was 86 years old and his horse had thrown him off, but here he was blithely shopping for some casual shoes for when he wasn't wearing his horse riding boots. He told me he didn't mind getting old that it was a privilege.
That was right after a customer from Indiana, I think, told me she was 85 years old and needed some good all purpose athletic shoes, for her aerobics, her yoga, her walking, her bike riding, heck she might have said her marathons but by then I was kind of in mind melt.
I remember Dad telling me when I was grown up lass that I wouldn't miss NE 50 th street that what I would miss would be him and mother. That home wasn't a place it was people. How true was that! I remember when Goleta CA was my home.
Home.
How delicious to go home when you are tired, scared, sleepy, worried, troubled. Home is where your people are, where your love is, where you feel safe. Jean and I talked about that, how sometimes you just want to go home and get out of the world for a bit. Away from tornadoes, bombs, accidents, disasters. Cliche that it is, home is where you hang your hat, whether it be for one year or eighty-six. Home is where Judy learned to walk. Marc built a deck. Janice feeds the birds. Or Ms 85 year old Indiana does her yoga.
Yeah, I think I will go home.
Life isn't always a pickle and cheese sandwich.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Memories and Shadows
Mother loved to whoop it up! She would slap her hands together, throw her head back and whoop with delight, with abandon, whether she was getting ready to lay down a killer score in Scrabble, drop a punishing play in dominoes, or join in an outlandish scheme.
Mother was abundant. She gave what she could, cooked what she had, lived where she was, and grew what was hardy enough for her rough red soil.
Mother was content with what life had handed her. All of her fears, despairs, or regrets were moderated by her loving things, places, experiences, food, jokes, stories, people, and kids, especially kids.
I love to see the shadow of Mother peek out in her progeny's diverse personalities. Thank you Jean, Jane, Jerry, Julia and Jeff for the wonderful wonderful wonderful comments:
From Jason via Jeff:When Jason was about 5 years old he walked over to Granny's every day to watch Mr Roger's Neighborhood and have Phoney Baloney Potato Soup, what ever that is. Jason talks about it still today. Does anybody have that recipe?
From Jeff and Julia: Although most of our childhood friends were a lot better off financially, they always wanted to come to our house to play. They may have had maids and bright shiny toys, but we had puppies, piglets, calves, a barn, hills to roll down, a rose rock mound, canyons, forts and cedar trees to climb and a mother that loved children. Mother was "Granny" to every child she ever met.
From Jean: Another favorite memory is when we would arrive home and upon departing the school bus smell the aroma of fresh baked bread, rolls, etc., which was the afternoon snack of the day (with lots of butter and jelly) since we didn't have dinner until Dad got home, which was sometimes late.
From Jan: No wonder those country club kids liked coming to our house.
From Julia and Jeff: The Halloween parties in the barn. The bonfire out back, climbing on the rafters to decorate the barn.
From Julia: Sugaring the homemade donuts for the Halloween parties in the barn (the only part of cooking I ever liked).
From Julia: I had the most amazing Cinderella birthday cake when I was about 12 years and Mother did it again when I turned 21. She looked all over Oklahoma City to find cheap ceramic horses and had to spend way too much for the horses, but I still have two (whoops) one of those horses.
From Julia: I was newly married, the truck was loaded and we stopped at the house to say "bye" to Mother and I could NOT leave. The blizzard of '79 was coming, Tal was pacing and Mother had to escort me to the truck and say "It's time for you to leave, Julia -- just LEAVE!"
From Jeff: Mother washed my football uniform in homemade lye soap. The coaches wanted to know how it got so clean, so Mom sent them a chunk of lye soap. I was the cleanest, and the brightest, earning me the nickname of Mr Clean!
From Jean: One of my favorite sayings from Mother was when she would tell me when I discussed my kids with her was, "Jean, they will grow up in spite of you." Jerry remembers this one also.
From Jerry: Keep your kids between the ditches. If you try to keep them on the straight and narrow you WILL fail.
From Jean: The fact that Mother taught all the grand kids how to give her insulin shots so if she ever needed their help.
From Jean: Once going tent camping in Southeast Oklahoma in October or November Mother packed her electric blanket hoping we might have electricity at Robbers Cave State Park.
From Jerry: Going tent camping for the family reunion at Johnson Creek during the blistering summer and Mom took her refrigerator and recliner.
From Jan: Only Mother!
From Jane: Mother teaching her the right way and the wrong way to stir gravy. When Dad complemented Jane on her pie crust and lemon pie, Mom told Jane, "If you can do it, I can do it better."
Mother and cars, trucks, and vans from Jerry and Jane: She liked to drive fast and hear the loud pipes. She was stopped in my Oldsmobile for speeding on Kelly.
Jane is working at Ed's. Hears tires squealing, motors roaring and mother going by drag racing in my red Ford.
The grand kids sitting on the motor in the Econoline van. Today we would all be in prison. Also making the van "hiccup" for the grand kids: brake/let up, brake/let up.
Jane and Mom going somewhere, a car engine on fire, Mom jumps out grabs an old blanket out of the van, smothers it out and goes on her merry way.
When you would tell her some fantastic gossip and she would look at you and say, "Do you really believe that?"
From Jerry: When I was 10 or so I was going to sell greeting cards door to door. Boy Scouts I think. Bought the 10 or 15 boxes of cards. It took me 10 minutes to decide I wasn't a door to door salesman. Mom used out of those boxes of cards for years and years and years. She got me my first job in computers after the Army. She convinced Dick Deaton, shy as I was, I could do the job.
From Jerry and Jane: Mother had her own United Nations in her family. Mom and Amber in the grocery store at Park Estates. Stopped to get something. A black lady with a child stopped next to her. She turns and sees Amber and friend are rubbing on each other to see if the color is permanent. Mom says, "Must be a mutual admiration society."
ABOUT Jane: Trying to convince Amber that she doesn't need to drive home from her driving test on ice and snow. Dancing with her kids to "Hunk of Burning Love" by Elvis.
From Jan: Only Jane!
ABOUT Jan from Jerry and Jane: Telling my children what awful stuff I was cooking for dinner so they would call Bob to go out to eat. Eating what Christian ate so I could lose weight. NOT!
From Jane: Mothers just do.
From Jan: Holy Crap, mothering is hard work.
From Jeff: Going through Mom's kitchen there would be a bag of sawdust, a bucket of lard, and a container of Morton Salt. I swear that is all that was in the kitchen! Thirty minutes later Mom would have a meal on the table. Deep fried something, mashed potatoes, gravy, home canned green beans and new potatoes, a jar of homemade bread and butter pickles, freshly baked bread, fresh churned butter, sweet iced tea and German Chocolate cake. How did she do that?
Does anyone have that recipe?
I'm glad she only used her magic for good -- not evil.
Mother was abundant. She gave what she could, cooked what she had, lived where she was, and grew what was hardy enough for her rough red soil.
Mother was content with what life had handed her. All of her fears, despairs, or regrets were moderated by her loving things, places, experiences, food, jokes, stories, people, and kids, especially kids.
I love to see the shadow of Mother peek out in her progeny's diverse personalities. Thank you Jean, Jane, Jerry, Julia and Jeff for the wonderful wonderful wonderful comments:
From Jason via Jeff:When Jason was about 5 years old he walked over to Granny's every day to watch Mr Roger's Neighborhood and have Phoney Baloney Potato Soup, what ever that is. Jason talks about it still today. Does anybody have that recipe?
From Jeff and Julia: Although most of our childhood friends were a lot better off financially, they always wanted to come to our house to play. They may have had maids and bright shiny toys, but we had puppies, piglets, calves, a barn, hills to roll down, a rose rock mound, canyons, forts and cedar trees to climb and a mother that loved children. Mother was "Granny" to every child she ever met.
From Jean: Another favorite memory is when we would arrive home and upon departing the school bus smell the aroma of fresh baked bread, rolls, etc., which was the afternoon snack of the day (with lots of butter and jelly) since we didn't have dinner until Dad got home, which was sometimes late.
From Jan: No wonder those country club kids liked coming to our house.
From Julia and Jeff: The Halloween parties in the barn. The bonfire out back, climbing on the rafters to decorate the barn.
From Julia: Sugaring the homemade donuts for the Halloween parties in the barn (the only part of cooking I ever liked).
From Julia: I had the most amazing Cinderella birthday cake when I was about 12 years and Mother did it again when I turned 21. She looked all over Oklahoma City to find cheap ceramic horses and had to spend way too much for the horses, but I still have two (whoops) one of those horses.
From Julia: I was newly married, the truck was loaded and we stopped at the house to say "bye" to Mother and I could NOT leave. The blizzard of '79 was coming, Tal was pacing and Mother had to escort me to the truck and say "It's time for you to leave, Julia -- just LEAVE!"
From Jeff: Mother washed my football uniform in homemade lye soap. The coaches wanted to know how it got so clean, so Mom sent them a chunk of lye soap. I was the cleanest, and the brightest, earning me the nickname of Mr Clean!
From Jean: One of my favorite sayings from Mother was when she would tell me when I discussed my kids with her was, "Jean, they will grow up in spite of you." Jerry remembers this one also.
From Jerry: Keep your kids between the ditches. If you try to keep them on the straight and narrow you WILL fail.
From Jean: The fact that Mother taught all the grand kids how to give her insulin shots so if she ever needed their help.
From Jean: Once going tent camping in Southeast Oklahoma in October or November Mother packed her electric blanket hoping we might have electricity at Robbers Cave State Park.
From Jerry: Going tent camping for the family reunion at Johnson Creek during the blistering summer and Mom took her refrigerator and recliner.
From Jan: Only Mother!
From Jane: Mother teaching her the right way and the wrong way to stir gravy. When Dad complemented Jane on her pie crust and lemon pie, Mom told Jane, "If you can do it, I can do it better."
Mother and cars, trucks, and vans from Jerry and Jane: She liked to drive fast and hear the loud pipes. She was stopped in my Oldsmobile for speeding on Kelly.
Jane is working at Ed's. Hears tires squealing, motors roaring and mother going by drag racing in my red Ford.
The grand kids sitting on the motor in the Econoline van. Today we would all be in prison. Also making the van "hiccup" for the grand kids: brake/let up, brake/let up.
Jane and Mom going somewhere, a car engine on fire, Mom jumps out grabs an old blanket out of the van, smothers it out and goes on her merry way.
When you would tell her some fantastic gossip and she would look at you and say, "Do you really believe that?"
From Jerry: When I was 10 or so I was going to sell greeting cards door to door. Boy Scouts I think. Bought the 10 or 15 boxes of cards. It took me 10 minutes to decide I wasn't a door to door salesman. Mom used out of those boxes of cards for years and years and years. She got me my first job in computers after the Army. She convinced Dick Deaton, shy as I was, I could do the job.
From Jerry and Jane: Mother had her own United Nations in her family. Mom and Amber in the grocery store at Park Estates. Stopped to get something. A black lady with a child stopped next to her. She turns and sees Amber and friend are rubbing on each other to see if the color is permanent. Mom says, "Must be a mutual admiration society."
ABOUT Jane: Trying to convince Amber that she doesn't need to drive home from her driving test on ice and snow. Dancing with her kids to "Hunk of Burning Love" by Elvis.
From Jan: Only Jane!
ABOUT Jan from Jerry and Jane: Telling my children what awful stuff I was cooking for dinner so they would call Bob to go out to eat. Eating what Christian ate so I could lose weight. NOT!
From Jane: Mothers just do.
From Jan: Holy Crap, mothering is hard work.
From Jeff: Going through Mom's kitchen there would be a bag of sawdust, a bucket of lard, and a container of Morton Salt. I swear that is all that was in the kitchen! Thirty minutes later Mom would have a meal on the table. Deep fried something, mashed potatoes, gravy, home canned green beans and new potatoes, a jar of homemade bread and butter pickles, freshly baked bread, fresh churned butter, sweet iced tea and German Chocolate cake. How did she do that?
Does anyone have that recipe?
I'm glad she only used her magic for good -- not evil.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Notice III
Notice: I've had three people respond to my request for mother comments. Thank you Jean, Jane and Jerry.
I dreamed all night about not going to work. I dreamed I called in sick. I dreamed I played hooky like in high school. I dreamed I called work and told them I had a flat tire and couldn't come to work. All night I dreamed about not going to work.
I went to work feeling slightly sluggish and yawning and stretching and just couldn't wake up. I noticed everyone around me sluggish, yawning, stretching and just couldn't wake up, so I was telling my boss about my marathon dream. She yelped "I had that same dream."
I'm semi-convinced it was barometric pressure. I seem to remember barometric pressure is sometimes the culprit.
Life isn't always a sweet dream.
I dreamed all night about not going to work. I dreamed I called in sick. I dreamed I played hooky like in high school. I dreamed I called work and told them I had a flat tire and couldn't come to work. All night I dreamed about not going to work.
I went to work feeling slightly sluggish and yawning and stretching and just couldn't wake up. I noticed everyone around me sluggish, yawning, stretching and just couldn't wake up, so I was telling my boss about my marathon dream. She yelped "I had that same dream."
I'm semi-convinced it was barometric pressure. I seem to remember barometric pressure is sometimes the culprit.
Life isn't always a sweet dream.
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