And Now It Begins

Retirement -- so far.

It is a whole new world, and now it begins, and I am part of it.

No more 3:30 AM alarm.

No more 50 mile commute.

No more Seattle traffic at all hours.

No more driving in the wind, rain, and fog.

No more $20.00 a day downtown parking.

No more hiking up the hill.

No more clocking in.

No more badges for this access or that.

No more customer problems, uncomfortable chairs, swelling ankles. angry colleagues, malfunctioning headsets or computers, bad break room coffee, Average Handling Time, quality scores, end of year self-reviews.

I thought I was ready for the end. I knew it was coming so no surprises there. I've been saggy, draggy, and la la gaggy. I can't see or hear very well, I was out of effort/energy gas, I hurt pretty much everywhere, I was distracted, sloppy, and pretty much emotionally exhausted. 

In my mind I was already gone.

~Instead~

I've been downright teary. 

It is a whole new world and I'm trying to be brave. 

No more employment.

No more money.

Retirement?

Day 1 -- not bad.

Insurance -- Social Security Office, I couldn't find a parking spot. Since it was the day after MLK Day the place was teaming. I could find a spot two blocks away, but with all the congestion inside I decided I would come back the next day. After all I am semi-retired, right?

Health -- I took a walk at the Light House Park. Not too the Light House Park but at the Light House Park. I didn't walk far but I did walk. Roger told me if I actually went to the park and got out of the car it was a successful trip. Sometimes my children are wise asses.

Beauty -- I wanted to admire the park, the water, the ferry, the mountains. All things I love. An emotional pick-me-up so to speak. 

Self-care --- haircut.

Nourishment -- QFC.

Starbuck's -- Starbuck's chai tea just because, well because it's Starbuck's and I'm semi-retired. 

I gassed up my car, signed up for un-employment, studied Social Security some more. That's when I discovered I needed one more document for SS. That's when my boss called and said I needed to come back downtown and sign the severance package. Had a cup of coffee at 7:00 PM -- whooo, I discovered it is the wild life for me. 

Day 2 -- not horrible.

The drive downtown was not crawl downtown. I left late enough, after all I'm semi-retired, that I missed the worst early day traffic soup. Signed the papers that needed signed, said good-bye to a few folks I missed the day before, said good-bye a second time to a few more folks, wandered around looking for the HR person who would complete my document that I needed for SS. Got the said document and took off North to go to SS. Did you know that on Wednesday's SS closes at noon. I was fifteen minutes late. Had a cup of coffee at 7:00 PM -- wow this is wonderful.

Day 3 -- Drove back to SS in the fog, in the rain, in the wind, early so I could get a parking spot. Third time is the charm, great I though! I waited to get inside, waited to sign in, waited to talk to the unsmiling agent who looked at me suspiciously. Squirming in my dripping coat my brain died and I forgot to ask some pertinent questions. Had a cup of coffee at 7:00 PM -- I detect a pattern here.

Day 4 -- I am NOT going back to SS today. My questions can wait until I regroup.

What now? Slow down -- I have the rest of my life to complete SS tasks, sign up for all my insurance needs, finish studying the SS info book, studying the SS website, continue trying to understand Parts A, B, C, D, Gap, Advantage and miscellaneous other aspects of being semi-retired. Yikes and Yuck. 

It was with great pleasure I threw away my decrepit pink lunch bag. No more packing lunches. 

My semi-retired goals; clear out my condo, improve health: walk, diet, get off pills. No more wishing I had the time and energy to start tossing things out. No more thinking of work schedules first. This semi-retirement stuff just might work out.

Facebook wisdom:

Have you ever noticed how people on FB take all kinds of silly/fun tests? When it comes to a test to determine alter egos I've noticed we all want to be a little bit rascally. We want to be bandits, pirates, dark souls. No one wants Opie or Aunt Bee as alter egos, we want Jack Sparrow, Darth Vader. We want to be a little bit bad, I guess to show our uniqueness to the world. We want some color in our ancestors, in our backgrounds, in our past lives. We want to claim the villain, the crown prince, the cattle rustler.  Somehow serf, slave, farmer, preacher, teacher just doesn't carry the same cache. Interesting. 

I also want to discover the internet. I do so little on the internet and other folks delve in deep and wide. Why am I so scared of it will someone tell me please? Well, besides the fact that once I downloaded some Super Heroes coloring pages for Connor and also downloaded a boat load of malware. Killed the computer, had to buy a new one, I'm on the cautious side now. No more having to pass on computer classes because they are offered on Tuesday and Thursday at 11:00 AM or Saturday seminars from 8:00 until 3:00. Or night time classes. I am now available. No more going to bed early, by golly I can stay up until 9:00 PM if I want to.

"Working hard for something we don't care about is call stress., working hard for something we love is called passion." 

I also want to release my creative beast. No more working hard for shoes.

"In the end we will conserve only what we love. We will love only what we understand. We will understand only what we are taught." 

I think I will learn something new. My first choice would be learn to drive a ferry, but I don't think the State of Washington will teach me that. Second choice would be travel to the moon, nah, I don't see that happening either. Any suggestions? I remember when Nora asked this question. Good question. I wonder how hard it is to become a barista?

I think I will take more naps. No more not napping at work.

Read a book. 

Watch a movie. I have Braveheart and Amy waiting.

I cooked a really nice FB recipe for Chicken Lemon Penne, very light with the lemon and very good.

When Jean sent me the dried corn, I remembered Janice said Jacquie makes a really good corn casserole, so I search on the internet and found a very yummy recipe for a corn casserole. I keep meaning to ask Jacquie for hers now that I have the time to do-doddle around with such worthy endeavors. Tal any new good recipes for me to try? Not ones for Julia's special diet but still healthy-ish. 

Remember the Book Challenge? Well the new book challenge book, since my eyes are cast forward, is: A book set in the future. I'm not sure which one I will choose, surely I have a book set in the future around here somewhere. 

I've turned my eyes to the future. It is a new world and I'm trying to be brave. I am a little scared, a little reflective, a little nostalgic, a little excited, a little engaged in the soft feelings of retirement -- dust to dust. 

Day 4 continued -- I think I will go to the store and buy some veggies. If it stops raining I will take a walk, a very small walk. I will have a cup of coffee this evening. I can't tell you how much I have enjoyed that evening cup of coffee. No more problems with caffeine keeping me awake. Insomnia doesn't matter anymore.

Sunrises and Sunsets don't change. Connor is still adorable. Sons are still sons. Ian is ramping up his help mom campaign. Family and friends are still sweet and sympathetic.  

I think I will have a good life or die smiling.